


All Is Well With Dean Winchester

by BeMyReverie



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hospital, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Bottom Dean Winchester, Camcorder, Castiel's Tan Trenchcoat (Supernatural), Falling In Love, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Gentle Dom Castiel (Supernatural), Gentle Kissing, Gentle Sex, Hurt Castiel (Supernatural), Hurt Dean Winchester, I am not a doctor, Illnesses, Impulse Control, Loving Castiel (Supernatural), Loving Dean Winchester, M/M, Mental Breakdown, Nurses, POV Third Person, Plot Twists, Protective Siblings, Religious Castiel (Supernatural), Sick Castiel (Supernatural), Sick Dean Winchester, Strained Friendships, Top Castiel (Supernatural), Top Castiel/Bottom Dean Winchester, Worried Castiel (Supernatural), Worried Dean Winchester, Worried Gabriel (Supernatural), Worried Sam Winchester
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-03
Updated: 2021-02-05
Packaged: 2021-03-05 19:06:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 10,955
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25680304
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BeMyReverie/pseuds/BeMyReverie
Summary: Dean Winchester hates hospitals, but somehow he ends up at one after a year and a half of struggled breaths and sore muscles. He thought he just over-worked himself, but it turns out to be something worse. Nothing good can come out of this situation- except that his roommate happens to be pretty friggin' awesome.
Relationships: Castiel & Dean Winchester, Castiel/Dean Winchester, Eileen Leahy/Sam Winchester
Comments: 30
Kudos: 57
Collections: Destiel





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> This book WILL have trigger content because of health issues. Illnesses are not pretty and I will be trying to explain and show the realism of it as best as I can. I am not a doctor though, so I can't say it will be 100% accurate, but I will try my best.

"Dean Winchester," A nurse says, holding a file as she stands at the beginning of a plain hallway, looking expectantly up at the waiting room, where Dean Winchester was in fact, sitting.

Dean stands up, wincing at the ache under his skin and gives a light wave towards the woman and then follows her through the long and narrow walkway. She motions him to head into a very sterile room. "Just sit down on the patient bed, the doctor will be right with you." She says with a small smile and then closes the door once Dean has moved to sit on the uncomfortable parchment papered bed.

"Yeah, right with me. Since when do doctors ever show up on time." He grumbles to himself, looking around the room to study the posters boredly while he awaited the doctor to show up.

The doctor ended up showing up after _twenty minutes_ of waiting. 

"Dean Winchester, hello, I'm Dr. Tacer. Tell me, what seems to be the issue?" He says after sitting at the desk.

Straight to the point then. "Uh-I've noticed that my breathin' ain't what it used to be. It's um- harder to take breaths in. Been losin' some weight rapidly, I guess. And-uh I'm just real sore lately." He says, uncomfortable as he watches the doctor write down everything he said.

Dr. Tacer nods and goes through the file and then looks at Dean. "How long have you been noticing this?" He asks, waiting for the answer.

"Breathing has been an issue for over a year, been sore on and off for around the same time, and I just recently noticed how much skinny I look." He says, trying to use his memory.

He watches as the doctor writes down more notes under those ones. "What type of work environment are you in? And do you smoke? How's your food intake?" He questions calmly, staring at Dean with this unmoving gaze.

Dean shifts his legs and winces at the paper crinkling under him. "Construction and welding. No, I do not though my dad smoked when I was younger and I eat like I'm gonna starve." He says honestly, watching the doctor nod.

"I'm not gonna lie to you, I think this may be something more serious than what you think it is. I'm going to send you to the hospital for a chest x-ray." He says, starting to write a referral and an email.

Dean blinks, he absolutely did not want to go to the hospital. It took him a week to finally get to the walk-in clinic. "Uh-now?" He asks slowly, hoping it wasn't now.

That hope was crushed when the doctor nods. "I actually think that driving wouldn't be a smart idea for you right now, but you seem like the stubborn type so please- head straight there." Dr. Tacer says and hands Dean the note in the scribbled jumble of words that was only read among people in the medical field.

Dean sighs and nods, grabbing the page, thanking the doctor, and heading to the hospital.

* * *

Dean walks in through the regular hospital entrance, going to the front desk. "Hello, ma'am, I was referred here by a Dr. Tacer? I have a note." He says and hands the page to the woman behind the desk. 

He watches as her eyes go over the page and she types lightning fast into the computer. "Yes, you can actually head right back. Follow the signs until you see 'X-ray waiting room'. A doctor will come and get you when they're ready." She replies and Dean nods slowly, listening to her instructions until he sees the sign and takes a turn to sit down in one of the chairs.

It doesn't take long for a doctor with a caramel complexion, a white coat, and a name tag that says 'Dr. Jackie' to come and get him. He was concerned for himself only based off the fact that the speed of him getting in was too fast for him to not have any huge problems. "Make sure you have no jewelry on and please remove any unnecessary layers. Make sure your shirt is completely cotton or very thin. Shoes off." She says gently and takes his leather jacket, his over coat, and his flannel from him as he strips those layers off. 

"Go lay on the bed, I'm going to go into the small room on the other side of the glass and when I speak to you through the microphone, please do as I instruct so we can have accurate x-rays." Dr. Jackie says with a sweet smile as Dean takes his shoes off and goes to lie on the almost plastic feeling cot. 

"Alright, Mr. Winchester- please be as still as you can, light breaths if you can. Keep your back straight." She says through the loud speaker and Dean listens to her every word.

There's a machine that moves over him, but stays a not terrible distance. At least 5 inches from his body. There's a few whirring sounds and clicks, like you would hear from a camera and then it's done. It's quiet for a bit and then the doctor is in the room, helping him sit up and handing his clothes back. "Mr. Winchester, I have some unfortunate news. You have something called Pulmonary Fibrosis. It's a lung disease which is what is causing your struggle to breathe. Your other issues are symptoms of what you have and it's been spreading for a long time." She murmurs to him, looking very sad.

Dean was lost, he didn't understand what she meant. "So... do I just get some sort of inhaler and some drugs and then I'm good to go?-" He starts, but she shakes her head, making him stop speaking.

"Dean... It's been spreading and building for a year and a half, maybe more. There's nothing that exists that can stop it." Dr. Jackie says, putting a gloved hand softly on his shoulder.

"What the hell does that mean?!" Dean says, his nerves getting the better of him. 

Dr. Jackie doesn't seem phased, she's probably dealt with worse tantrums. "It means that at the rate this disease is going at, there's a chance that you may not survive more than 3 years. Now I'm going to help you get admitted into special treatment, if you have any family or friends, you may call them, ask for them to get some of your stuff. We'll set you up in a room..."

Dr. Jackie's words weren't going through Dean's head. All he heard was the sad, but formal tone of her voice. It was like he was underwater. Why did this happen to him? He kept thinking as he's lead or urged to a section of the hospital he didn't want to be in. Ushered into sweatpants that must have been kept for long-term patients. He was one of them now.

That thought didn't exit his brain as he's shown a room with two beds and a curtain between the two, but it was opened. There was a male in one of the beds and he looked like he had been there for awhile since there were pictures and what looked like personal items around him. He's told to get into bed, then they give him an IV and one of those oxygen tubes that rest just below his nose. He was spaced out, dead silent as he goes from a lot of attention to none. Then it's quiet besides the monitors and machines around him and the other male. 

Dean Winchester hated hospitals and there he was in a hospital bed for the unforeseeable future. 


	2. Chapter One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean tells Sam about the news and distracts himself by talking to his roommate. A Castiel Novak.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings for this chapter:  
> -Dean does question Castiel's faith a bit in case that's a trigger for anyone  
> -There is a small death joke, I only put it in there because I know that's how Dean would be coping

Dean had been in the hospital room for less than six hours and he was already stir crazy and stressed, which caused his heart rate to pick up a lot and his breathing to get worse because he felt so panicked. 

Finally, he had the nerve to take his phone and slide it to Sam's contact. He hesitates before he does though, glancing towards the other male in the room. The man was reading the bible of all things. Dean resists the urge to roll his eyes. Why would the male hold faith over a God that obviously doesn't give a damn that he could possibly be dying in the bed beside Dean. Despite the slight negative thought, he clears his throat softly and watches as the man's electric blue eyes look up and pierce into Dean's very soul,

If Dean didn't already have a currently hitched breath, it would've been taken away by the gorgeous facial features the male had and the soft gaze upon his eyes. "Sorry to bother you, dude, do you mind if I..." He holds up his phone, words functioning less with the guy's unwavering stare on him. 

However, the male understands what he's trying to motion and nods. "Go ahead, I would say I will not eavesdrop... but we are in close proximity and even the curtain provides little privacy for conversation." He says with a gentle smile playing his very full soft pink lips that Dean may or may not have been staring at.

Dean nods a quick thanks and presses call on Sam's contact, anxious for what was about to go down. How would he word it? Surprise Sammy, I might die soon. That wouldn't go over well and Dean didn't want to give his brother anymore reason to worry about him than what he had to tell him. He would tell him minimal as possible and to not leave California because at this point, Dean was fine. Dean almost didn't notice that Sam had picked up and muttered a 'hello' into the phone.

"Sammy, hey- Listen I need to tell you something and you need to not freak out, okay?" He says quickly before Sam gets into one of his Stanford rants, which Dean usually loved, but today he needed to talk.

"Oh God, you got arrested didn't you? I knew you were going to end up there again-"

"Sam! No! I didn't get arrested-" Dean hears his roommate snort in amusement.

"I'm in the hospital. I'm... I'm sick, Sammy. Somethin' called Pulmonary fibrosis. It, well, it's killin me slowly. But don't worry, we both know I'm too stubborn to die." He says quickly.

It's silent over the phone before Dean hears a sniffle from Sam's end. "Hey! You better not be googling that crap. I'm gonna be fine, the hospital bill is gonna be more deadly than this disease, Sammy."

"You're not funny, Dean. I don't want you to die. You're my family." He says, voice cracking a bit in sadness and Dean couldn't help but react to his sad tone, eyes watering. 

"I know, Sammy, but I'm going to kick this disease in the ass, I'm not going out so easily. I want you to focus on your school, you hear? Because if you fly your ass out here to see me in the middle of your semester, I will take you off my visitors list." He says sternly and hears Sam sigh into the phone.

"Fine, but just know that I'm not happy with that. You're more important than school for me, Dean."

Dean looks around the room for a moment. "I know Sam, just do it for me, okay?"

"Okay, Jerk."

Dean smiles softly "Bitch." Then he hangs up.

"It seems like Sam is worried about you." The male says from his bed and Dean glances over.

"My name is Castiel Novak," He introduces himself.

"Dean Winchester, and uh- yeah... but he shouldn't be though. He has University to focus on." He replies.

Castiel, nods, seeming to think over his words. "You seem to not like showing that you are in pain." 

Dean snorts "Who are you? Dr. Phil?" He grins slightly and watches as Castiel tilts his head in a questionable manner.

"No, I am Castiel Novak." He says and Dean laughs.

"It was just a joke, dude. A reference almost." 

Castiel nods again and gives a smile. Almost seeming embarrassed. "I don't that reference, but I am not good with understanding many pop culture things." He says honestly and Dean can respect that.

What Dean couldn't respect though, was privacy. "So... why are you in here?" He asks curiously, sitting cross legged on his bed which was okay because he wasn't wearing a hospital gown, luckily.

"Oh. I have pneumonia, it's gotten worse over the past while so I'm staying here till it's under control. Don't worry, the case I have isn't contagious." He assures and Dean gives a small smile at his assurances.

"I would tell you what I have, but I assume you heard over the phone and there's not much more to say about it." He says softly.

Castiel looks over at him. "Perhaps we can become friends while treatments are going on." He suggests, almost shy about it.

Dean beams at him, happy that such an attractive male even wants to interact with Dean. "I'd like that, Cas." He muses, happy to move onto a happier subject.

"Cas?" Castiel questions, tilting his head. "Is that a nickname?" He asks curiously.

Dean laughs softly, ignoring the slight pain and loss of breath from it. "Yeah, I hope that's okay..." He states, now worried he may have crossed a line.

"It is okay! The only other nickname I've gotten is Cassie from my older brother and I find it insufferable." Castiel chuckles out. 

Dean smiles again, relaxed. "So, you gotta show me the ropes around here, I haven't been in a hospital since I was born." He muses and Cas flashes him a perfect white smile that has Dean melting.

"I will be definitely showing you these so called 'ropes'." Castiel chimes from his bed and goes on to tell Dean every detail about how they had to share a bathroom and how they can leave the room by telling nurses and using wheelchairs, how checks go and food. 

Dean listened intently to every detail, listening to the gravel of his voice and his words how they slurred together a bit, but were still understandable. Dean was happy to listen to this man forever. Even though he didn't even know him.

After Castiel finished explaining everything, Dean smiled and tilted his head. "Wanna play 21 questions?" 


	3. Chapter Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time to meet the boy's nurses and Gabriel.

By the time they had finished playing 21 questions, they had asked more than 21 questions, but now knew a solid amount of information about each other. 

Dean knew about Cas' childhood, how it had mostly been him and his older brother, Gabriel. He learned that Castiel was 27 wanted to be an English teacher, but had to pull out of school because of his pneumonia. He knew Castiel's favourite colour was yellow and he was obsessed with bees. Castiel had learned a fair amount of stuff about Dean as well, which was good. Dean did sometimes like opening up about his life. Especially since this was his life now.

Currently, he was telling Castiel a story about how one time his brother had glued his hand to a beer bottle and so Dean got revenge by putting itching powder in his underwear. Castiel was laughing so hard, the machine was beeping rapidly and Castiel was in a coughing fit.

After a few minutes of the annoying beeps, two nurses came in. One was lovely lady named Allie and the other was a kind girl named Fawn. They were both amazing people and very soft and caring as Allie checked Castiel and Fawn checked Dean. “What have you two trouble makers been up to?” Allie Asia and Dean glances over to Castiel as Castiel looks at Dean.

Both burst into a fit of soft Laughter. Both the girls smile at them, but give them a soft reminder to take an easy because of their breathing conditions. They also hand them dinners. Which are microwave steak and French fries. They leave after putting the plates down.

”Is it good steak? Because if the hospital ruins this for me, I’m suing them.” Dean says in fake seriousness.

Castiel was already picking at his food as he glanced at Dean. “It’s as good as microwaveable steak gets. Though, it comes close to State & Main.” He says as he takes another bite.

Dean pauses for a moment. “Cas, did you just make a semi joke?” He gasps, ignoring the dull pain that rested in his chest after that motion. 

Castiel just smiles with a mouthful before motioning for Dean to hurry up and eat.

They eat Silently, the only sounds coming from the machines around them.

* * *

It was later that night, Dean was trying to drift off but with the medication running through his system and his body hyper aware of its surroundings, it wasn’t coming so easy. He wondered if Castiel was awake and if he could bother him until he felt tired enough to close his eyes.

But Castiel beat him to the punch. “Dean? Are you awake?” He asks, Dean nods before realizing Castiel probably couldn’t see him.

”yeah, I can’t sleep,” he says softly, trying to be honest.

“I can’t either, some nights are better than others.” He whispers through the dark.

Dean mentally agreed. “You know what I do sometimes that helps me sleep?” He asks softly, taking in the role of the helper like what he often did with his little brother.

Not that he saw Castiel like a little brother, but Dean did feel care for Castiel. Just in a different way.

”What do you do?” Castiel asks.

Dean smiles softly. “I close my eyes and think of what could happen the next day. Like maybe tomorrow I’ll wake up and have Doctor Sexy on my tv screen. And a big ass slice of apple pie-“ he says and makes a fake moan sound that makes Castiel chuckle from his bed.

”Well, tomorrow my brother is supposed to come to visit. You can meet him. He has very chaotic energy though.” Castiel warns and Dean laughs softly, trying to stay quiet and not put so much pressure on his lungs.

”I’m sure it’ll be great.” He murmurs to Castiel after a few moments before he realizes he went to sleep.

Dean shifts with a wince, sore. Maybe tomorrow he’ll wake up and realize it was all a dream.

* * *

News flash: It wasn’t a dream. Dean wakes up sore and with Fawn turning his oxygen machine up because his body wasn’t producing enough. She fixes his bed and puts the tray over his lap. 

“morning, sunshine! Today is scrambled eggs and toast.” She says happily. 

“I can turn the tv on for you and then after that you should shower.” She chimes with a playful scrunched face to act like he stunk, then switches the screen on.

Dean smiles at her optimism in the morning and eats quietly as she leaves.

“Mornin’ Cas,” Dean chimes with a mouthful and turns to see Castiel with a smile on his face. He looked better than yesterday. 

“Is that the show You were talking about? Doctor Sexy?” He asks with a curious head tilt.

Dean looks at the screen. “Damn! It is! Wow, my day is perfect so far! Breakfast in bed, my roommate at my side and doctor sexy.” He grins and Castiel chuckles.

”So, when is Gabriel coming?” He asks as he watches the screen a bit and eats his breakfast.

”He usually appears around lunch. Sometimes he brings McDonald’s burgers, hopefully this is one of those times.” He says with a hopeful sigh. 

”Castiel Novak, you’re the burger to my pie~” Dean says dramatically.

Castiel gasps and makes his hand to his chest. “Oh my gosh, the honour. I’ve never felt so completed!” He says and Dean giggles.

Yes. Giggles.

”by the way, Cas. I’m showering first.” Dean says and turns to see Castiel giving him a competitive glance.

”you’re on, Winchester.” 

Castiel ended up winning. But Dean was okay with that because he got to finish the doctor sexy episode.   
  
Castiel didn’t take long, Dean assumed it was because he knew his way around the bathroom with his IV. Dean on the other hand, struggled when it was his turn. He was also less sore than yesterday, but more clumsy because of the drugs they put in his IV. He struggled to stand straight and ended up sitting in the shower chair, which wasn’t awful, but he couldn’t help but feel slightly weak and vulnerable.

Dean was out a bit faster than he thought and dressed in few sweatpants and a white semi-tight long sleeve. When he left the bathroom, he saw a very short male with weirdly golden glazed waves of hair beside Cas’ bed.

Oh, right. Cas’ brother, Gabriel. 

"Dean, this is my older brother, Gabriel." Castiel says softly with an almost nervous smile.

Dean gives Gabriel a smile as he gets back into his bed. "Hello," he murmurs politely and watches as Gabriel gives a very friendly and bright smile. 

"Hey-o Dean-o! Cassie's told me lots about you while you were scrubbin' up! He says he likes how your eyes render an 'Everest forest on a perfect summer day'." Gabriel says with a sly smirk and amusement playing in his whiskey coloured eyes.

"Gabriel!" Castiel scowls and Dean watches as Castiel's cheeks turn a few shades of red. 

Dean was also blushing, a very shy grin playing on his lips. "Well my eyes can't even compare to the lightning blues Cas is sportin'," He says, trying to take the attention off the fact Castiel had practically called his eyes pretty.

Castiel's gaze lifted to look at Dean to see if he was joking, but Dean showed no sign of teasing or lies. Gabriel laughed and made a soft 'awwing' sound. "Well aren't you two just buckets of goo for each other." Gabriel taunts with a cheeky smile as Castiel nudges his brother in slight annoyance.

"That's enough, Gabriel." Castiel huffs and Dean gives a soft sound of amusement towards their brotherly affections, reminded him of Sam and himself.

"So, little bro- I did bring you two burgers, you could share with Dean if you feel so inclined, but I gotta go- the candy shop calls for me." He says and says his goodbyes before leaving. 

"Did your brother just ditch you for candy?-I-thanks." He says softly as Cas tosses the second burger towards him.

Castiel laughs at Dean's question before nodding. "He owns a candy shop," He rephrases with a smile. 

Dean nods slowly with a grin and takes a bite of the burger and moans at the flavour. "Perfect," He murmurs, mouthful.


	4. Chapter Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We take a trip a few months into the visit, Castiel's health is improving, while Dean stays in a bit of a worse condition than he was in when he got to the hospital.

***Time Skip Two Months***

Dean was currently trying to get Cas' attention by throwing his pillow at him. "Cas! Let's play a game, come over here. We can play go fish!" He complains a with pout and a smile, taking in as deep of a breath as he can; the oxygen tube still resting below his nose. 

Castiel looks up from some book Dean thought was boring to smile and move over to the end of Dean's bed. "Fine, but we both know I'm going to beat you, Winchester." He teases and Dean giggles, trying to ignore the dull wince of pain he got from it. 

"You wish, Novak!" He smiles and grabs his playing deck of cards. 

Dean and Castiel had been bonding over the few months. They now acted like they had known each other for a lifetime and they actually talked about that. They both believe that maybe their souls existed in another world or universe with each other, hunting monsters or something. Dean wasn't going to lie to himself, Castiel was someone he was starting to form a little crush on. He tried to ignore it though because Castiel was getting better and was probably going to leave soon.

Dean didn't want to remind Castiel of his hospital experience.

Dean handed out the cards between him and Cas and then put the rest of the deck between them, still in his head a bit. He was pulled out of it by Castiel putting a gentle hand on his knee. Dean's gaze flickered up to meet his eyes. "Yeah, Cas?"

"I asked if you were alright?" He says gently to Dean again, not moving his hand, he was keeping his eyes connected with Dean's.

"Just... thinking." Dean murmurs softly, chewing his bottom lip as he watched Castiel tilt his head. 

"About... us." He whispers, blushing darker, nervous.

Castiel let a small smile, a curious smile playing his lips. "What about us?" He asks as he moves his hand to hold Dean's. 

"Uh... like what it would be like if we kissed." Dean says anxiously, but life was too short to keep it in any longer.

Dean flashes Cas a smile, before looking down. "I'm sorry, that was stupid of me to say-" He starts to ramble before Castiel silences him by putting his mouth on Dean's.

Castiel's plump, pink, pillowed lips covered Dean's with gentle force and his hands move gently to cup Dean's face between them. Dean leans to kiss back trying to remember the feeling. Cas' lips were warm and he tasted like the honey tea he always had for breakfast. 

"I wonder what would happen if maybe we had a conversation about us." Castiel says softly against Dean's lips.


	5. Chapter Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean and Castiel deal with the kiss and Dean finds out some news about Castiel and deals with it well, but he doesn’t deal with his emotions the way he should.

The kiss.

It had happened just the night before and now here they were. Cuddling in Dean's bed, Dean curled up against Castiel's front. "Cas," He says gently.

"Yes, Dean?" He asks with a hum, pressing his lips against Dean's head.

Dean smiles shyly, feeling Cas' mouth against his head. "Why are you in the hospital? For pneumonia?" He questions, nervous that it was insulting or rude.

"Well, my immune system isn't as strong as the normal person's so when I got sick with it, because I was around a lot of fumes... It hit me a bit harder and it shut my body down, so I had to come to the hospital. It was a bit of a process because they didn't want to release me too early and have something else enter my system while I was already compromised." He explains, calm and happy.

Dean nods. "But you're getting better now?" He replies, nuzzling against him again, feeling Castiel nod against him.

”Actually I was told earlier that I’m allowed to be discharged today.” He says softly, Dean straightens and looks at him with wide eyes.

”You did?? Why didn’t you tell me earlier?” Dean asks and he feels Castiel tighten his arms around him.

Castiel sighs softly and rubs Dean’s back gently. “I didn’t want to tell you right away, I wanted to enjoy some time with you and then when we kissed I mean, I got distracted-“ he says softly and smiles.

Dean giggles softly and turns to fully face him again, glancing at his lips shyly. Castiel smiles, noticing his gaze and gently pressing his lips to Dean’s again.

Dean smiles into the kiss with a happy sound, moving closer before feeling a tug at his oxygen tube. “Careful,” he says softly to Cas, moving to readjust it.

Castiel watches Dean as he sticks his tongue out in concentration. Dean looks back at Castiel with a bright smile. “What?” He questions.

Dean watches as a very soft smile grows on Castiel’s lips. “I just think you’re gorgeous.” He murmurs to Dean; Dean feels a flush go through his cheeks.

”We’ve barely been a thing and you’re already too good for me.” Dean chimes and blushes darker as he watches Castiel lift an eyebrow.

”So we’re a thing?” He grins and Dean hides his face, groaning in embarrassment.

”No no no,” Castiel chuckles, gently trying to take his hands away from his face. “You don’t get to hide from me!” He scolds playfully.

Dean pouts and then giggles a bit at Castiel who kept pecking his frowning mouth. “Okay okay,” he gives in, playfully exasperated.

Castiel smiles before moving away from the bed. “I should start packing my things.” He says gently with a smile.

”Then I can come back and cuddle with my adorable boyfriend.” He winks at Dean who gives a childish and cheeky side grin.

Dean watches as Castiel walks back to his bed, and suddenly his heart rate picks up a bit and he felt very restless. Castiel had already been in the hospital with something that could’ve possibly been fatal. Dean didn’t want to remind him of that. He knew Castiel was his freedom while he was stuck in this hospital bed, but he also knew that he was Castiel’s reminder of an awful experience. He didn’t even know how long he was going to last, he didn’t want to put Castiel through that. Especially when he didn’t know the outcomes for himself. 

But he watched as Castiel hums Can’t Help Falling In Love by Elvis. He watches as Castiel’s movements seemed to light and weightless as he packed up his things in a supplied cardboard box. And he watched as Castiel met his eye and gave a smile so bright that Dean didn’t need the sun to supply light anymore. 

Dean was far from knowing anything about his condition or how it would turn out. But he knew that as long as he had some sort of fight left in him. He was going to use it to show Castiel that he was more than just an expiration date. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would just like to say, that once again I’m not an expert on the illnesses that these characters have, but I have put in enough research to know that what I’m writing isn’t unrealistic. I don’t mind constructive criticism, but I’d rather not take critique to how I display the illnesses I’m writing about. Thank you for understand and reading.


	6. Chapter Five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel is discharged from the hospital; before he leaves, he gives Dean a gift. Dean has to deal with his emotions and the loss of Castiel.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's some mention of Castiel's religion and he is Christian so I just wanted to let you know ahead.

Dean watched as Castiel packed his bag and the side of his room now looked more like an actual hospital room. Dean had been more quiet than usual, his brain building up a storm of emotions and stress. He was so in his thoughts he didn't notice Cas had crossed the room to him, until he felt a gentle hand pressing against his cheek. He blinked and suddenly focused in on Cas' eyes.

"Dean? I want you to have something of mine," He says and Dean nods, intrigued now.

He stares at Castiel as he pulls out a little camcorder. "It's fully charged and there's a lot of embarrassing stuff about me on it, but- It'll give you some more insight on me until I can share all my life moments with you on our first date," He says, almost shy.

Dean blushes and looks up at him with wide eyes as he holds the video camera close to him. "Cas, thank you so much- and hey, don't forget about me out there." He says softly.

 _Unless it's easier for you._ Dean thinks bitterly to himself, but was slightly sated by the fact Castiel had lightly pressed his mouth to Dean's.

"I would never forget something so bright and beautiful," Castiel murmurs gently against Dean's mouth.

Dean blushes brightly, but says nothing because what he wanted to say was 'Don't leave', but he knew Castiel would be happier out of the hospital and in the actual world. Away from him.

Castiel pulls away with a smile before sitting up, looking at his phone which he had pulled out of his pocket. "My Uber is here, I'll see you soon, okay?" He says as he runs a hand through Dean's hair and grins brighter as Dean purrs against the touch.

"We'll be exploring that later," He chuckles and presses his lips to Dean's forehead before getting up, grabbing his bag and leaving the room.

The door closed with an almost silent click and Dean stared at the chipping paint on the frame. Sighing, he glances away from the way to freedom and looks at the camcorder in his hands. He opens it and chooses the oldest video. 

There was Castiel, shaggier hair than he had currently. His face was kind of zoomed in, but he looked very happy and very tanned compared to the more pale version he knew. "This is my first video on my awesome and totally not old camcorder, I mean this is the twenty first century! Don't let this technology die! Anyway, I wanted to share my religious experience with you..." 

Dean notes the way his voice seems just as low and gravelly as now and the way he squints like he's staring directly into the sun instead of the lens. He was wearing a grey AC/DC shirt sunglasses rested on top of his head. He was gorgeous. Like a sun god or an angel more like it.

"Anyway, my religious experience. I just came out of church! And I had this feeling while the pastor was talking about the sowing of seeds. How the seeds can't grow in curtain circumstances because of the devil. I know I haven't been planted in rock by Satan, but I don't think I've had the growing I believe is coming to me. 'Grow in adversity' quoted by... whoever said that. Anyway, I'm going on a jog, maybe meet the man of my dreams." He says and smiles at the camera before the video ends.

Dean hadn't noticed till he saw his reflection in the little screen that he was grinning like he won the lottery or some crap. But all he saw was... damn- maybe he did win the lottery. The smile fades for a moment. He won the lottery and lost the lotto ticket. Or bought a pie and realized it expired the day before. Before he can self-degrade anymore Fawn comes in. 

"Hello, Dean. I know it must be tough losing a roommate, but I'm here to ask if you would like to transfer to a single patient room?" She asks with a small smile. 

Dean didn't know if it was pity of being in such a happy space with memories that can't really be the same or if she was actually doing her job, but either way he didn't mind. "Uh-yeah, maybe a change will be good for me... Give me a few minutes to get my things together?" He asks.

He didn't actually have that many things, but Fawn respected his request and left the room. Dean moves to the next video, noticing that there was an obvious change between this Castiel and the one in the last video. He plays it.

There was Castiel, drenched in sweat, deep circles under his eyes and his skin significantly more grey contrast to his sun-kissed skin in the last video. "So, I think I've come down with a fever and can't really move too much without feeling stabbed... also not to be graphic. But whatever I'm coughing up- looks like a melted alien." He whispers close to the camera. Dean notes that his lips are tinted a light blue and extremely chapped. He chuckles at Castiel's description of presumably- phlegm. "Anyway, Gabriel is on his way over to drive me to the hospital, but I think he's just overreacting because I told him I hadn't eaten in a few days-" Cas is cut off by Gabriel walking in a hazmat suit.

"Let's get a move on, little bro! Don't question the suit, I don't need your sickly contagious germs all over me!" He says as he walks closer to Cas.

"I should go, signing off." Castiel murmurs at the camera before the video ends again and Dean finds himself a little happier with a little extra energy to get out of bed.

He calls for Fawn back and is lead to his new room, it smelled bleached but sanitized. He's placed in a new bed, a comfier bed in his opinion and placed on a few extra drugs as Fawn noticed he was moving a bit more stiffly than usual and apparently he looked extra tired. "You gotta get your beauty sleep for your trench coat angel," She teased and Dean tilted his head curiously, drifting but aware.

Fawn giggles. "You'll see when he visits," She assures before leaving a water and a container of pudding before leaving.

Dean stares at the chocolate pudding until suddenly he's staring into the darkness of his eyelids and he sinks away into a well-needed sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel the camcorder is going to be important to the story... We all know which fic I got that from (;


	7. Chapter Six

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean watches more clips on the camcorder and gets guest, though it isn’t who he’s expecting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m sorry for being gone so long, life got busy! Trying to update when I can.

Dean awoke a bit later from his presumably short cat-nap. It was either too much sleep or too little sleep, judging by the sunlight outside it was too little. He shifts and glances around the room, momentarily confused at why it was just him.

Foggy memories appear at the front of his brain as he rubs his eyes. Cas was gone and the sound of only one heart monitor showed that. Looking at his lap to calm himself down, he sees the camcorder placed along the blankets. Glancing around, Dean decided that he could watch another video because no one was there to entertain him or stop him.

Castiel in this one was at the beach, his hair flying in all directions as the wind from the water threw itself at him. He was smiling, as he often was. “So I’m here, at the ocean. I’ve always wanted to see it and here I am! With my trusty and best friend... you! Whoever you are! It’s probably myself watching this, so tell me- do I look as hot as I think I do?” video Castiel asks before making a face, only to have beach water spray at him.

Dean giggles as Castiel makes a ‘blegh!’ Sound, grinning as he watches him recompose himself. “Okay I guess not, good thing I’m wearing my swim suit! Ha! Suck it ocean!” He yells at the wind before turning back to the camera.

”Well, I hope you’re having a great day and maybe the next video will be me skinny dipping so the ocean can suck it.” Castiel snorts in the video and Dean cracks a wide smile that hurts.

The video ends.

Dean sighs, content with Castiel content. At least for the moment. He already missed actual Castiel.

As if summoning him, he gets a text message from him. Dean wasn’t sure if his memory was horrible or not because he couldn’t remember giving him his number.

Castiel: I’m sending you pie, don’t worry I made it so it probably isn’t poisoned ;)

Dean giggles and then a knock appears at the door. Glancing up, slightly suspicious- he shifts. “Yes?” He asks, watching the door. 

The door opens and in comes a giant moose, giving a slightly apologetic smile. “Hey, Dean,” he says as he walks over.

Dean narrows his gaze suspiciously. “You’re supposed to be at school! You know- university or whatever?” He asks. “What are you doing here, Sammy?”

Sam huffs at Dean. “It’s nice to see you too,” he says sarcastically and Dean rolls his eyes.

”Stop being so frantic, give me a damn hug.” Dean opens his arms after placing the camcorder to the side.

Sam was more excited than he let on as he squeezes Dean into a close hug. “You’re bossy.” He grumbles into his shoulder, Teasing.

”Stop whining, bitch. I missed you, but seriously, what are you doing here?” He asks, frowning.

Sam pulls away and rubs the back of his neck with an innocent shrug. “I missed you, jerk. And you’re sick and we take care of each other.” He replies.

Dean huffs. “I take care of /you/.” He corrects and it has Sam groaning as he pulls up a chair, sitting in it.

”You look like a log, I feel bad for the poor person who one day gives you a chance.” Dean teases.

They grin at each other and Sam gives a sly smile. “Actually, I’m dating someone right now.” He says, looking past Dean as if they were over his shoulder.

Dean checks to make sure. Nope, just him and Sam. “Her name is Eileen,” he says softly. “She’s deaf, but I’ve been learning ASL to talk to her and she’s really good at reading lips. And really funny, I think you’d like her!” Sam says excitedly, rambling.

As much as it made Dean happy that Sam had found someone, it also made him hurt. What if he never got to meet her? What if he left Sam alone? He doesn’t want to think about it, so he tunes back in, Sam still rambling about her.

Sam pauses for a moment, seeming to notice Dean’s mind was somewhat elsewhere. “Hey, what’s going on?” He says, nudging Dean’s arm.

Glancing up at him, he chews his bottom lip. “I have a boyfriend.” He says slowly, not sure what Sam’s reaction was going to be. Though, Dean knew that Sam was pansexual and was very supportive of the LGTVQIA+ community, it still didn’t help calm his own internalized homophobia towards himself and fear of rejection.

To Sam’s credit, he didn’t look phased. He just looked in awe. “Was it that guy you used to share a room with? The nurses were gossiping or talking about it when I came through. May I ask what your sexuality is? If you want to tell me of course, but I love you and I’ll support you no matter what of course-“ Sam was ranting and it made Dean’s eyes water.

”Sam- slow down. Yes, it’s him- Castiel. And I’m bisexual. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you before-“ He’s cut off.

”I mean I kind of already knew, but I definitely didn’t want to mis-identify what I was seeing or stereotype it. But flannels everyday, Dean? Cuffed jeans? The fact that you look at girls and guy’s asses?” He says, smiling.

Dean chuckles, blushing. “I just- wanted to be careful- I don’t know how much of Dad has gotten to you-“ He’s once again cut off.

”He never got to me, Dean. You know why? Because he wasn’t the one who was there for me. He wasn’t the one teaching me what I needed to live.” He says, squeezing Dean’s arm gently.

”You’re my brother, but you’re also my role model.” He says gently, making Dean crack an emotional smile.

”Stop with the chick-flick moments.” He huffs with a grin, making Sam roll his eyes.

”Shut up, jerk.”

”Bitch.”


	8. Chapter Seven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean gets the visitor he’s longed to see in person.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: Mention of a God/belief.  
> Suggestive tones.

Dean was currently watching Doctor Sexy on the tv hanging off the wall. Entranced by the way the doctor seemed to know exactly what he was doing whether it was surgically healing someone or screwing someone in the elevator.

It had been a few days since Sam’s visit ended. He was happy to see his brother, even though he never wanted Sam to see him like this. Of course Sam is too damn stubborn for his own good.

Dean sighs, it was one of the better days. His breathing was still crap, but he wasn’t as sore today. Perhaps it was the new medication he was put on. The nurses specifically told him it wasn’t going to heal him, but it would make the pain more tolerable. And it had. So Dean was grateful.

He glances out the window, not really interested in leaving the room much. He enjoyed his time alone and no one out there was anyone he truly wanted to socialize with. “Fuckin’ Cas.” He mumbles softly to himself.

”What about fucking me? Because I’m fairly certain I’m the top in this relationship,” a voice chimes from the door and Dean whips his head around so fast, it takes his eyes a moment to catch up.

Castiel. He was there. Thank God or whoever the hell existed that made Castiel happen. Dean smiles and blushes at the words as he takes them in. Castiel smiles when he sees the reaction. “I was going to bring pie, but Gabriel accidentally ate it-“ he says as he walks over to Dean, close enough that Dean could touch.

Dean doesn’t waste another moment to reach up and grip at Cas’ shoulders, pulling him down to crash his mouth gently to his. “Don’t care ‘bout no pie, you’re here-“ he mumbles against Cas’ lips.

Castiel gently pulls away after a moment. Fixing the tube that rested along Dean’s face. “Need to make sure I don’t steal your breath for too long.” Castiel jokes and Dean giggles.

”Have you been enjoying your home movie productions?” Castiel asks and motions towards the camera on the bedside.

Dean gives a wide smile, holding Cas’ hand. Needing to touch him somehow. He nods with a giggle. “I watched them all, you’re so cute.” He says.

Castiel snorts. “I’m fucking hot as hell, cute? That’s you- though I’d say you’re more on the adorable side.” He says, nosing Dean’s hair gently and pressing a kiss to his head.

“I missed you,” Dean murmurs softly, closing his eyes and inhaling softly through his nose, taking everything about Castiel in.

Castiel hums and plays with his hair, causing purring sounds to emerge from Dean’s lips. “I missed you too, you have no idea.” He says.

”I’m sorry I didn’t come visit earlier, I thought I’d let you have time with your brother. Probably too early to meet him. Though you’ve met Gabriel and it’s always too early to meet him-“ Castiel was on a soft ramble that Dean couldn’t help but hold onto, just nodding along.

”How have you been feeling?” He asks gently, holding Dean close.

Dean shrugs gently with a small smile. “Still kicking,” he says.

”Dean kick ass Winchester.” Castiel muses and Dean’s smile widens.

”Castiel lick ass Novak-“ Dean whispers in response and he can feel Castiel’s laugh rumble through him.

”How about I show you what I can do to that ass with my tongue, won’t even know what hit you.” He whispers softly in Dean’s ear, kissing along his jaw.

”I’d like that.” Dean says softly, breathless, in the good way this time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m sorry I’m so bad at regular updates. I want to try and finish this as fast as I can so I don’t leave it unfinished for y’all.


	9. Chapter Eight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel gives Dean a surprise and a release.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: Release has two meanings ;)  
> Smut!

It had been a week or so since Castiel last came. But Dean wasn’t worried, they texted everyday and FaceTimed and overall it was a stable relationship.

Dean had just finished talking to the doctor, he had been having shortness if breath for a few days and the doctor had put him on some special medication to help with the symptoms that seemed to want to wreak havoc on his life.

He was currently texting Cas about the updates.

Dean: Put me on some new meds so I don’t breath like dying Walrus.

Cas: I’m very glad that you are not breathing like dying Walrus for much longer.

Dean: Come visit me for a celebratory pudding?

Cas: I will be coming to visit soon, but I have something much better than pudding. And it’s not pie either.

Dean: Can’t be that good then.

Cas: Just you wait, Dean Winchester (;

Dean smiles and it seemed like a good place to stop conversation before he got ahead of himself and tried to pry the answer out of Castiel. He was a bit exhausted anyway, some rest seemed like a good idea.

Putting his phone to the side, Dean allows the soft sound of his oxygen machine to lull him to sleep.

* * *

”Dean,” He hears a whisper through the rest of the mostly silent room.

He scrunches his nose sleepily, not wanting to acknowledge the voice.

”Dean, come on, get up.” He realizes quickly it’s Fawn, one of his main nurses.

Blinking tiredly, he squints his eyes open at her. She was smiling brightly and seemed very bouncy. Holding a bag and a.

Before he got a word in, Fawn starts to speak. “Okay, get up, get your shoes on. I already got you hooked up to the transferable oxygen machine.” She says quickly, Dean barely has time to process the words.

”What’s going on?” He murmurs, voice thick with exhaustion.

Fawn smiles slyly. “It’s a surprise.”

* * *

After begrudgingly and slightly curiously (okay super curiously) getting ready, Fawn leads him down to the main floor. It feels weird to be out of his room, especially holding onto a rolling machine that wasn’t like the ones other people were dragging through the halls. This one looked like a rolling backpack.

“Dean!” He hears another voice and perking up, he glances towards the doors to see Castiel. His smile splits wide and he goes over to him, kissing him deeply. It takes him a moment to realize he wasn’t in the privacy of his room, but surrounded by people. And Castiel. Castiel was here and holding a blue tie. A tie Dean had seen in a few of the clips on the camera.

”I know this might be a bit more fast paced than you’ve been used to for the past few months, but I need you to let me put this over your eyes and you got to trust me.” Castiel says and Dean raises an eyebrow.

”Of course... but please don’t attempt murder on me.” He muses and Castiel laughs and he loves Castiel’s laugh.

”it’s dumb of me to do that in a hospital where you can get help-“ Castiel jokes back before kissing his head and sliding the tie over his eyes. He holds Dean’s hand and Dean realizes he’s also picked up the portable machine. “Get ready for your surprise.” He murmurs.

* * *

The drive was calm, Castiel speaking of his plans outside the hospital walls. He had gotten used to his job in the bookstore and it was attached to a coffee shop. He saw Gabriel pretty regularly and got to take on jogging again.

Dean couldn’t help but be a little bit envious, he was happy for him, but he longed to do stuff like that. Minus jogging, gross.

Eventually the vehicle slows to a stop and Dean feels Castiel's hand gently on his thigh. "I'm going to get out of the car and then I'll get you, okay? Keep the blindfold on." Castiel says and kisses his cheek before the door is opened and there's some shifting.

Dean feels a soft cool rush along his face as his door is opened and Castiel takes his hand gently to help him out. He's being led somewhere, his oxygen tank on his back. Curious, he stays quiet. Wanting auditory clues. 

Just a lot of wind.

"Okay, now..." The blind is pulled off and Dean squints as light hits him.

The ocean, they were at the ocean. "What is this?" He questions and glances at Castiel, smiling softly.

Castiel grins brightly at him. "I wanted to take you to one of my favourite spots."

Dean takes it all in, the bright blue of the ocean seemed so dull in comparison to shine in Cas' eyes. 'so cheesy' Dean rolls his eyes at himself. He glances at Castie; again. "You didn't have to do this for me-" he's cut off by Castiel's lips being pressed against him.

Dean kissed back gently, feeling arms around his waist. His lips were so soft and warm, Dean couldn't help but lick gently at Cas' mouth and Castiel hums, pressing his body against Dean's and successfully pinning him to the car (which was a weird pimp car).

The kiss gets a bit heated quickly, Cas' tongue exploring Dean's mouth and his hands running closer to Dean's hips. "Is this okay?" he murmurs against Dean's mouth.

The nod Cas gets is overly excited and added on with a "please,".

One of Castiel's hands stays on his hip and the other is sliding gently into Dean's pants, palming him through the thin layer of boxer material. "Tell me if you need me to stop, love." Castiel says gently as he moves his mouth down Dean's jaw.

Dean clings tightly to Cas' bicep, forehead against Castiel's shoulder, nodding softly as he holds himself close. The touch gets a bit more teasing as Castiel's hand slips under the last layer of clothes and wraps around him. Dean moans softly against him, trying to stay quiet.

"You're so amazing, Dean, I couldn't imagine being with someone better than you." He whispers softly against his ear.

Dean blushes brightly and hides his face closer to Castiel, feeling a soft chuckle against him. Dean whines when he hears that sound and Castiel kisses him to keep him quiet. "Hush now, baby, I won't cut you off." Castiel assures, speeding his hand up along Dean.

It doesn't take Dean long to finish against Cas' hand and murmur a soft apology about the mess. 

Castiel kisses him softly. "No apologies from you," he says against his mouth "no need for you to apologize, you're all good." He says and runs his clean hand through Dean's hair, eliciting a purr from him.

"Sorry-" Dean says quickly, blushing at the sound. "Don't apologize, you're okay, Dean, I think everything you do is so damn cute." He muses and Dean whines shyly. 

Castiel pulls him closer, cleaning his hand with a napkin he had shoved in his jacket. "Let's go find heart rocks and stick our feet in the water." Castiel says and pulls him gently into his arms and leads him to the water, both of them giggling excitedly as they head to the open sea. 

Where Dean wished he could never leave this mindset, he felt like he could breathe, he felt like he belonged. With Castiel. 


	10. Chapter Nine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean is allowed a sleepover away from the hospital for ONE night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNINGS: Soft talk that may be seen as a form of suicidal thoughts.

The ocean. The water that Dean had spent a good amount of time around was pooled around his ankles as he stood with Castiel, just breathing.

_Breathing._

It shouldn’t sound as surreal as it does. But breathing didn’t come as easy as it once did. Right now though, it felt like Dean didn’t need air to live. He glanced at Castiel who has a smile so wide and eyes squeezed shut as the sea mist hits him. He was beautiful.

Gone was the ghostly and sick male who laid across from him all those months ago, now replaced with someone who had grown out of the hospital gown and was now living their life. A life away from the hospital.

Dean glanced at the water below him. Sometimes he wished he was a seashell. Where he was allowed to sink to the depths and not have to worry about anything because it didn’t matter. Or he could be found and placed on a mantle like he was prized and desired. He wanted to be something.

”Dean?” Castiel’s voice knocks him out of the dazed trance he was in, blinking up at Castiel, who’s wide smile was now formed into a concerned tilt.

”I’m okay, sorry the water just hypnotized me.” He says and squeezes Cas’ hand, which was now against Dean’s.

Cas’ smile reappears and he kisses his cheek. “I have one more surprise for you, would you like to dry our feet off and I’ll tell you I’m the way back to the car?” He asks curiously, seeming very sly and mischievous.

Dean nods, Cas’ surprises hadn’t let him down just yet. “Let’s do that-“ he replies, aollowing Castiel to lead him to a patch of sand and pulling a towel out of nowhere.

Or maybe Dean was just distracted by the rest of him to notice a towel.

Castiel hands the towel to Dean first, who does his best to dry his feet off quickly and hand it back to Castiel, who does the same. Helping Dean up, Castiel brings them back towards the vehicle. “So the doctors and I agreed, that maybe some time away from your bare walls would be good for you.” He says casually, but it makes Dean stop in his tracks.

Blinking hard, Dean allows the words to settle in. “What does that mean?” He says, just to make sure he wasn’t getting anything wrong.

”Well... I was wondering if you maybe wanted to spend the night with me at my place? If not,-“ Dean doesn’t let him get to the end of the sentence before he’s kissing him hard, feeling tears spring up.

”Yes, please, yes. Thank you” Dean says, repeating the words against his mouth and Castiel hugs him close.

”Let me show you my hot spot then, that’s my house. Come on, I’ll drive. I already grabbed some medicines for the night from the hospital because I know that sometimes the pain is worse during the evening. And I didn’t steal them, Fawn helped me make sure everything was in order.” Castiel rambles as he helps Dean get into the passenger seat and then gets into his own seat.

Dean doesn’t mind the running sentences, smiling widely. He got to be with Castiel for a day longer. And that was good in his books.

* * *

The drive to Castiel’s house isn’t long and it isn’t awkward. They make all these plans for the rest of the day and the night. Eating, binging, singing, cuddling, kissing. And it doesn’t sound bad at all.

When they get there, Castiel gives Dean a tour and it isn’t huge, but it’s cozy and it’s just Cas. Dean finds himself very keen on nuzzling with the bisexual coloured Pie plush that Cas bought him as they lay against each other on the couch. “Why do you find Doctor Sexy, sexy?” Castiel asks after they’ve started an episode.

Dean glances up from where he’s resting his head against Cas’ chest. “I guess because he helps people and he has cowboy boots, also he doesn’t take shit.” He replies and Castiel nuzzles him gently as he speaks.

”So if I wore cowboy boots, would I be sexier than him?” Castiel questions, making Dean giggle and peck his lips.

”You’re already like, so much sexier than him.” Dean muses.

”Oh, am I?”

”Definitely.”

They spend a few hours watching Doctor Sexy and playing Monopoly (which Castiel kicks his ass at, but it’s only because Dean let him win). They eat a lot of food and Castiel bakes him a pie while Dean eats the pie filling when he isn’t looking. The afternoon was finishing and the early evening was upon them quickly. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’ve decided there’s either going to be ten or eleven chapters. I’m not sure if they’ll come out in the next week or in the next month. I just kind of type. (:


	11. Chapter Ten

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean and Castiel spend the evening and the next morning together (:

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: Smut! Illness symptoms and effects. Some mention of anxiety.

Dean was resting against Castiel’s side, their hands linked together. There was no TV or radio in the background, but both of them stayed together in the moment, watching out the window at the moon that was slowly making an appearance. Dean feels Castiel's rumbled voice before he hears it in his ear. "This may be forward of me, Dean, but would you like to engage in intercourse?" He says lightly against him while pressing his chapped lips to Dean's temple.

Blushing at the question and giggling at the formal wording, he nods slowly as he tilts his head to press his lips gently to Cas' mouth before pulling away. Castiel hums before getting up and leading Dean to the bedroom, carrying his oxygen tank for Dean as well. Opening the door, Dean is gently pulled inside and happily glances around.

The room matched the mood they had been for a good amount of the day, fairy lights were stringed along the walls and the glow was soft against the pale cyan of the bedding and walls. It was nice and Dean instantly felt calmed and safer than he usually felt. Castiel squeezed his hand gently and Dean flickers his gaze up to him as Castiel brings him to the bed and lays him down. "Is this still okay, Dean?" He whispers.

Dean nods and murmurs out a soft yes for verbal response. His body shudders under Castiel as his clothes are stripped away from him body and goosebumps go over a lot of his surface area. Not because he was scared or cold, but because his _boyfriend's_ touch always started a spark in him. He felt the light kisses from Castiel along his neck until they reached his mouth, hands now removing his own clothes. Dean just watches him, he was gorgeous inside and out and Dean didn't understand how it was possible. 

There was a click of a lid, cool sensations and finally a slow and careful push until hips were against hips. Castiel's hands now rested on Dean's hipbones that showed a bit more than they should, but Castiel didn't say anything or even second glance as he stares into Dean's eyes. "Tell me when I can move, lovely." He muses and doesn't break eye contact.

After a few moments, Dean nods as he watches the very patient male above him slowly starting to move his hips enough to create enough of a sensation to pull out a soft moan from both of them.

* * *

From there it gets a little faster, enough for them to both be glad there were no neighbours around; and enough for Dean's breath to hitch but not come back just as fast after they both finished. Dean was gasping quietly, trying not to worry Castiel, but it was too late. Castiel noticed and immediately made sure his oxygen was coming through the tube and rubbed his chest lightly, guilt flowing through his gaze as he watched Dean fight a struggle he couldn't help him against.

Castiel squeezes his hand again as reassurance as Dean's breath finally evens out, face flushed as he shakily looks up at him, body suddenly heavy from the event that resulted from the time they had climbed off each other.

"Dean, I am so sorry, I shouldn't have pushed you-"

"Cas, shut up. I'm okay and this wasn't your fault... it just happens." He murmurs out, squeezing his hand gently but there was a firmness behind it. 

"Just lay with me, I want to sleep now." Dean adds on after a moment, watching Castiel slowly nod and lay beside him, arm over his waist carefully, to keep him close. 

And while Dean fell asleep extremely fast, Castiel barely blinked until he was sure Dean's breathing was stable enough to make it through the night.

* * *

The next morning, Castiel had panicked when he saw Dean was no longer in the bed beside him. The panic drained away when he smelt something sweet in the air.

And coffee.

His feet slap lightly against the cool wooden floors as he makes his way to the kitchen. Wooden planks turn into marble tile and he smiles as Dean moves around the kitchen. His movements are a bit awkward because every few moments his tank gets in the way or the oxygen tube gets tangled, but he looks adorable in the domestic scene.

Castiel must have been staring for moments longer than he thought because Dean turns around and is beside him in a minute, hugging him and burying his face against his shoulder. “Breakfast is ready,” he muses and presses a kiss to Cas’ cheek which makes a wide smile appear on both male’s faces.

They sit down, with pancakes filled with chocolate chips and covered in icing sugar. Well in Dean’s case anyway. Castiel’s pancakes had bananas and strawberries piled on top instead to balance out the food portions instead.

Dean shovelled his food into his mouth so fast, Castiel was genuinely afraid he was going to choke or stop breathing. Dean didn’t notice the worry, in his own little world of syrup and pancakes covered in sugar.

It was quiet as they ate, but the peaceful silence was broken when Dean spoke up, mouth full of food, but voice coming through anyway. “I want to take you on a drive in Baby.” He says softly, gaze finally going to Castiel for the first time since they sat down for the delicious meal.

Castiel takes a moment before he responds. “I’d really enjoy that, Dean, but do you think it’s a good idea with your condition-“ 

“Cas, in the most polite way possible. Fuck my condition. I’m asking just for this, okay? Let me take you on a drive.” He says, seeming almost desperate.

It wasn’t Castiel’s place to decline or tell Dean that he wasn’t allowed. Dean was of course allowed to do whatever he wanted. It didn’t stop Castiel from thinking of every worse case scenario on the planet. Nodding slowly, he watches a wide smile break along Dean’s lips and knew he made the right choice.

* * *

It isn’t long before Dean is standing in front of Baby, squeezing Cas’ hand in excitement. 

“This is Baby, my 1967 Chevrolet Impala.” He says, rubbing his free hand along the vehicle’s slick black frame.

Castiel stares hard at the car. He knew this car had value to Dean. More than just dollar signs. He glances at Dean who is already looking at him to see his reaction. Castiel smiles sweetly towards him. “She’s lovely, Dean.” He says, honest.

Dean seemed very happy with the response and unlocks her, trying to maneuver his way into the car with his tank. Lucky for Cas, Dean accepts the help to get situated. Then Castiel strolls the the passenger’s side and gets in watching Dean as he rubs his hands along the wheel.

Starting up the engine and making sure everything sounds right, they drive off. The landscape around them blurring by even though they aren’t even going above the speed limit. Dean thinks Castiel looks extremely handsome as the sun hits him and he squints in annoyance at the glare. Glancing back to the road, he sighs.

”Dean? Are you alright?” Castiel’s worried voice drifts over the purr of the engine under them.

Smiling wide, Dean nods. “I just fucking love you, so damn much.” He says, honest and raw. His face flaming with anxiety as he allows himself to fret that Castiel may not say it back; that it’s too early to say that.

The anxiety slips away fast as Castiel grabs Dean’s thigh, just above the knee, thumb stroking the denim. “I love you so fucking much too.” He says, voice serious, though his eyes soft when Dean’s gaze flickers over to him.   
  
Dean laughs, relieved and sneaks a kiss to Cas’ lips before Castiel is reprimanding him, _lovingly,_ to keep his eyes focused on the damn road.

And everything is okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It took me such an embarrassing amount of time for me to remember the word case in this chapter, judge me in your head, but comment your love for the book 😉 OH BY THE WAY. The last chapter is next chapter (:


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